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All articles for mcsweeneys.net
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McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: You Look at Me Like You’ve Never Seen a Neo-Hipster Before. (mcsweeneys.net)
Hey guys, long time no see, toss me a PBR—actually, better make it a Coors Light. I know, I look different, but before you all start saying how I ...
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McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: Please, For the Love Of God, Stop Doing My Exercise Program. (mcsweeneys.net)
Hey there. Thanks for popping in this DVD. As you’ve done at the start of every previous workout, you should give yourself props for embarking on ...
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McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: The Comma From Which My Heart Hangs. (mcsweeneys.net)
1. If nothing else, one ought to know how to treat a comma. Abandonment or abuse of the comma muddles discourse, and this lack of respect is akin ...
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McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: “Toto’s ‘Africa’” by Ernest Hemingway. (mcsweeneys.net)
[Originally published July 1, 2011.] - - - At the airport the young man heard far-off drums echoing in the night. He imagined the young woman ...
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McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: Excerpts From Steamy Romance Novels for Parents of Young Children. (mcsweeneys.net)
The playgroup was engaged with squeaky toys in the living room. He caught her languidly peanut-buttering slices of organic stone-ground whole-whea...
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McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: It’s Not You, It’s Quantitative Cost-Benefit Analysis. (mcsweeneys.net)
Susan, we need to talk. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately. About us. I really like you, but ever since we met in that econ class in college...
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McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: I’m a Social Media Community Manager! (mcsweeneys.net)
I always knew I’d be successful. Yep, just out of college and I’ve got my first job, and what a job it is: I’m a Social Media Community Manager fo...
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McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: I’m an English Professor In a Movie. (mcsweeneys.net)
Good morning, and welcome to Advanced English Literature—I’m Professor Anglosoundingname. As you can see, I have a mane of silver hair and wear a ...
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McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: Your Spirit Animal is a Tech Guy Named Paul. (mcsweeneys.net)
Hey! Over here! Dude! You made it through your vision quest! Welcome! I’m your spirit animal, Paul. Yeah, I know the term is sometimes “animal,”...
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McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: First They Came for My Assault Rifle. (mcsweeneys.net)
First, they came for unregulated handguns in the possession of citizens with violent criminal records, and I said, “You know, that sounds reasonab...